Stressed-out high school student with face in hands

You Should Switch to Decaf If…

Know these warning signs of the stressed-out, over-caffeinated high school student.

You Should Switch to Decaf If:

  1. You’ve been on Wikipedia for 23 hours and still can’t figure out why there was no Pope Sixtus VI in your AP Euro textbook.
  2. You’ve been studying calculus so long that the voices in your head have bodies.
  3. You’re writing code to circumvent the character limit on the common app.
  4. You’ve spent more than 45 minutes trying to figure out the difference between Chicago and Turabian citations.
  5. The idea of applying to 15 colleges suddenly sounds good to you.
  6. You’ve found Waldo.
  7. When you’re cursing out the common app for not having an 11th line for your expertise in miniature golf.
  8. Your English teacher assigns a ten page paper and you ask if it’s okay if you’re ten pages over.
  9. Your study break to Starbucks results in your request for something larger than a trenta.
  10. Your guidance counselor sees you in the hall, asks how you’re doing and your response is: “Not now, I’m busy!”
  11. Your regional officer has received twelve emails from you asking if they’ve gotten the last fifteen.

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